The Plan.

I had it all figured out. My plan was set, ready to go. I was excited and ready to take on the world. And then slowly, piece by piece, goal by goal, it all fell apart. And I mean all of it. I failed at some, got distracted and forgot about others, and then somehow I found myself with nothing but a broken plan. Dreams never to come true. Not even a new plan to take its place. Just confusion. Frustration. Fear. How could all that planning. All that dreaming. All that work towards it end up with nothing to prove? Nothing to show. And then I realized it. 

After much time had passed I finally realized it. I had something to prove. I hadn’t actually ended up with nothing. I hadn’t actually gone on living without a plan & I didn’t even realize it. Because it wasn’t my plan. I hadn’t been wandering around lost in the wilderness of this world. You see I actually ended up with what I needed. What God knew I needed. Strength. Perseverance. Hope. Faith. Love. Positivity. Patience. Understanding. I had all of these things surrounding me. But they didn’t just come to me. They didn’t just fall into my lap. I had to fight for them. I had to give it all I had to get them. And most of these. Most of these things I earned I never even factored into my original plan. College. Career. Money. That’s the plan, right? That’s how we’ll change the world, right? Make our parents proud? But all of those things are gone eventually. The careers end or make you unhappy. The money runs out or loses its value. And then what’s left?  

And the ironic thing is, we never plan those things into our lives. We never pencil in strength and patience on our calendars & count down to the days we have left to reach them. And we need them. Boy do we need them. 

You see, I had walked out unharmed, and actually stronger after the fire. After my plans came burning down. And that’s worth something. That proves something. That shows something. Because it’s the things you can’t frame that are worth displaying the most. __a.c. 

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2 Comments

  1. “Because it’s the things you can’t frame that are worth displaying the most.”

    Thanks for the literal tears at work Lex. But really, I love you so much. I am so proud of you and the strength you display for Baby A every day. You are such a beautiful, strong, encouraging woman. Things may not have gone as you planned, but sometimes that’s the best part about this little journey we call like. I miss you tons, and look up to you so much. Keep on doin’ you silly thug.

    • ❤️❤️❤️ you are the sweetest Kaykay! I love you & am so blessed that you’re such a great role model for Ayden to look up to. I can’t wait to meet sweet Levi!

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